Priority is a funny word. It means a thing that is regarded as more important than others. Sounds pretty permanent but, in reality, it’s not. There are different sets of priorities in everything we do – work, relaxation, family, to-do lists, games, chores, everything. What you put as number one varies from day-to-day, task to task, and on a need-basis.
Well, wait until you have kids.
People have different priorities. I was raised in a very loving family. My parents and grandparents always put the kids first (and I have a lot of cousins), and we all had lots of fun together. Family was the main priority. We grew up playing with each other, hanging out, getting in trouble, doing everything together. And then, my parents packed us up when I was 12 and the four of us moved to the USA. Priorities changed. Though we still had awesome family time between us, my parents worked ridiculously hard to provide for me and my sister and to make sure we had the best of everything. The priorities changed even more after my sister and I entered high school, then college, then the four of us went our separate ways. Then my sister and I both got married, and I had twins. Boom. Major priority change.
But everybody is different. Not everyone was lucky enough to be raised in a very family-oriented environment as I was, and living away from family makes it hard to recreate that with the girls. My parents remain in Houston, TX (yes, they’re fine despite all the destruction Hurricane Harvey just caused down there) and my sister and Kyle, my awesome brother-in-law who I’ve known a little longer than my sister has (thanks for helping me pass Pre-Calculus, bro), currently reside in Memphis, TN. As much as I love Upstate NY, if I had the chance to relocate closer to both those cities, I would in a heartbeat. That’d be a huge priority to me. Luckily, the girls are also priorities to them, and my parents take a week or so off every month and come up to see them. My sister also takes time off her insanely busy life and job to FaceTime them frequently and come see them. And that is the best feeling in the world – having family that legitimately cares unconditionally.
My hobbies and previous priorities are currently on hold. I used to be really into video games and board games, used to obsess about LARPing (Live Action Role Playing – it’s a freaking blast) and our nerdy LARP family, we used to go to the movies and to Vertex, our favorite nightclub. I used to be able to do whatever I wanted, whenever. Go see my parents in Houston? Sure, let me list for the flights. Drive the short hour and forty-five minute to see Rick’s entire family? Let me grab the dog and let’s go. Go to Las Vegas or San Francisco with Rick so I can wander around while he works? Let me list myself for those flights. Now, the girls are my priorities. My marriage should be the top one, as marriage is the foundation for a good, loving family, but that either takes two or enormous effort on one’s part. Sure, it’d be nice to be able to truly relax on my days off from work and lounge on the couch, or continue my Mass Effect: Andromeda save on my awesome gaming computer that does not get used anymore. I’d love to just take care of the house and make sure groceries are all done, or make it a priority to go to the doctor and dentist, or go get my nails done. Nope. Making sure the girls are happy, fed, clean, active, and giving them the attention they need around the clock are my new priorities. Trying to have one-on-one time with my husband, who I sadly don’t get to spend much time with anymore, is also one of my priorities.
This personal blog started out as a priority. I needed a new hobby, something I could do after the girls went to sleep without making much noise at all, and something other than obsessing over every detail in Game of Thrones (that show owns my soul). I needed something that would make me feel good about myself, that would help take the edge off after a long, hard day at work, or after a day filled with cranky babies and their squeaks. I needed something that would help me relax and allow me to get rid of unwanted feelings. This has been such an amazing outlet for those things, and it’s helped me stay sane and do something I surprisingly really enjoy doing.
Priorities change, people change, and hobbies change. Change is a constant in life, how you adapt to it is everything. We only have one short, unforgiving life to live.
Are your priorities what they should be?